Tuesday, July 31, 2007
I am sorry to write and say that Paul had a bad episode of colic Sunday afternoon. The vet came out and gave him some banamine and tubed him. Paul still had not passed any manure by the next morning and went down again. A second examination by the vet showed what we couldn't see the evening before, that the blockage/kink was in Paul's small intestine.
We discussed all options with the vet. His opinion was that it was unlikely that the blockage would resolve itself. In a younger horse, chances might have been as high as 20%, but for a 20-year old mule, the chances were nearly zero. The odds of recovery through surgery were only slightly better, assuming he made it through the surgery at all. At this point, Paul was fairly comfortable due to a second large syringe of banamine, but his breathing was labored. He was becoming dehydrated. His gums were pale pale pink.
Right before noon, we decided to let Paul go before he began to feel any pain. Based on the cold hard facts, it was a simple decision to make, but one of the hardest things to actually do. I led him into the round pen and we all said our goodbyes. The vet and I were quiet together, standing hidden on Paul's near side. The vet put the needle in and Paul went down slowly and peacefully, just like he did everything else in his life.
We buried Paul over by the ring, next to the new barn, in a patch of lush green grass. Johnny dug a deep deep grave and laid Paul in gently with his feet tucked up underneath him.
For a mule who went unappreciated for 19 years of his life, his last one couldn't have been any happier. Every one who met him, loved him. I couldn't bring him up from the pasture without people, adults and kids both, stopping to tell him hello and give him a scratch or a hug. You always hear about how stubborn a mule is and how hard they are to work with, but I don't believe that's true. Every minute I spent with him gave me happiness. He had a great memory and as soon as he figured out the logical reason behind my crazy requests, he was happy to comply. He did everything I ever asked him to do and I tried to do the same for him. He was a good friend to me. He carried me wherever I asked him to go. He toted my son around and never took a wrong step. My husband is frightened of horses, so a giant mule should have scared him to death, but he loved Paul and was proud of him, too.
I am so glad that Paige and Johnny took a chance on Paul and brought him home from the auction that day. I am grateful to them for letting me lease him and spend so much time with him.
When the day comes that I see Paul again, I will tell him one more time how proud I am of him. But I don't believe he will have forgotten. After all, mules remember everything.
It rained all night that night, I heard it from inside, where I was waiting in a stall to start to feel better. Mah Editor cam out early the next morning. I was sleeping into the stall with my feets tucked up beside me. We go out and she brushes the shavings out of mah hair and wipes off mah face with a cool cloth. I am still not hungry or thirsty. I am not interested of the water or fresh hay. Mah belleh still hurt. I has not yet pooed.
The vet coms out again. Mah Editor drove fast from work to be there and coms over to rub mah head again. I feel so bad. I get more bananamine. There is a discussion, but I don’t care to listen in. I can not concentrate. What ever it is, it is important, for every one is gathered around. In a minute, Mah Editor leads me into the round pen.
I remember it now. Every body coms up to hug onto me. I get so many kisses. Every body tells me what a good boy I am. It is like every other day, except this time every body is crying. Then every body leaves except the veterinarian and Mah Editor. She says to me, “Thank you, Paul” and som other mushy private things. Now they are quiet with each other and close their eyes for just a minute. There is not one single sound any where. The veterinarian gives me one needle, then another, then another one. I am sleepy now and close my eyes, too.
I want all of you to know that I am on this other side now. There is so much to do, I has not been all around the place yet. When you walk in, all you can see is big grass and rolling hills. Look up and you see mountains in the distance, when I get time I am going to walk over to them. Did you know that every single animal I has ever known is here? Mah own mother is here, I have not seen her in so long. There are so many horses and mules, I did not think I ever met so many, but I did. Dogs, cats, all kinds of animals, som of whom belong to som of you. They are waiting for you. If you are an animal and you go to the other side before the people who love you, this is the place where you wait for them. When your human person gets here, then you go over to them and pick right up where you left off when you were onto the earth, except this time neither one of you has an ache or pain, or has trouble communicating, or runs short on time because you has to go to work and pay the bills.
So I will wait for you here, right where the grass is high and the clover is mixed into it, close to the shade trees. When I see you coming across that field, I will be right over to meet you at the gate, just like always.
I bleev I will see you all again. In the mean time, I remain,
Friday, July 27, 2007
I have not been any where. I hav been right here, waiting for Mah Editor to stop working so much. She works into a lah firm, a place where you go to if you need som one to help you transact official business, or if you get into fight with som one and need to hire som one to help you argue, or you steal som one's belonging or stab them with a nife and are going to jail. Or if you just want to get a house, Mah Editor will help you do all the paper work to get your self a house. At the end of the month is when every body wants to sell their house and buy a new one.
All week long she has been hearing, "I HAS A QUESTION ABOUT MAH HUD!" "IS MAH SURVEY BACK YET, MAH BUYERS WANT TO LOOK AT IT!" "HOW MUCH MONEYS DOES I HAVE TO BRING TO CLOSING??!?" "IS IT FUNDED YET? WHEN CAN I GIT MAH KEYS?"
There has barely been enough time for her to come out and groom me and feed me an apple at the end of every day. We are going on a trail ride on Sunday. May be she will take som photographs.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
Yes, it's true. If you don't bleeve me, you can go visit his web page: http://www.bazzyboy.net. I has also linked to it over there at the top.
He has a web site of his own, much snazzier than mine, his Editor is brilliant. His name is Bazz and like my self, he enjoys to eat things. His family is more famous and has run into the races and had statues made of them selves. But since he lives in Australia where every thing is the opposite, he has decided to make a career of going slow and was thus retired from the track. I say, more power to him. There is no point in being into a hurry. What ever it is, it can wait.
Go look at his page. It is nice.
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Mah Editor has instructions to share mah apples with her. She is a little thin. A halter has also rubbed the hair off her beautiful muzzle but that will be all right. She just got here last night and has already had a bath and is settled into a cozy stall.
I can not wait until she can com outside to see me.
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Pleased to meet you, Hyphen-Roe.
Grooms me. Yeah, just like that.
Come on, quit looking back. Never look back.
Good job, Hyphen-Roe!
Friday, July 20, 2007
We have been doing this all week. It's not as exciting as it soundzzzzzzzzz . . . . . *snore*
Tomorrow, though, I get Two Special Visitors.
Monday, July 16, 2007
Today is the day I get new shoes. I've been practicing every day. Because I've been thinking. Before you act ugly to som one who is trying to help you, before you raise your leg up high in the air, before you shift all your weight to the foot he is trying to pick up, before you aggravate som one who has already shooed a barn full of horses that day, who is holding a hammer, you should put yourself in *hiz* position. How would I like it if som one thwarted me at every turn? I would not like it.
So I stand like a champ and get back shoes. I have turned over to a new leaf. Besides, Mah Editor told me that I must behave or soon no one will want to work on my feets.
Sunday, July 15, 2007
Molly back at ya here, coming to you from indoors in the shade where the fan is blowing. It certainly is cool in here. I don't know what it's like outside. Let's ask Paul, shall we? May be Paul will know. Since he is outside. In the hot. Without a fan. That's too bad for Paul.
(Editor's Note: It's a well-known fact that Molly despises Paul. Paul is fine--a breeze is blowing and he has on his fly mask.)
Check out my spy mask. This way I can look at you with out you knowing I am watching you. In case you are sneaking up on me with a halter and a lead rop to go put a saddle onto me. It is not worth getting the grooms if I am only going to have to haul you around som where. Speaking of masks, Paul has got a mask but his does not have green on it.
That is all I have to say to you right now, Dear Reader. Check back in the future, when I hope to be making another comment.
Saturday, July 14, 2007
But as luck would hav it, the big gate can swing open a little wider and we are able to slip through.
Friday, July 13, 2007
I can't wait for fall and then coms winter. I have requested a red coat. One light weight, one heavy weight and one medium-weight puffy liner (does not need to be red but preferably should be red.) Instead of a hud that attaches to me separately, wut I need is a coat with the hud built on.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Belleh like a beach ball
Wut’s that thing?
Will it bite?
Can I eat it?
You know that’s right
Peeps callin’ mah name
Is that a peppermint wrapper?
I know that sound!
Give it to me
Don’t be shy
Com on I’m hongry
I ain’t gon lie
Hurry up and grooms me
That feels good
Put on the saddle
Take a walk in the wood
I’m a giant mule
You don’t need to worry
I won’t trip on nothing
Or get in a hurry
Back to the barn
Tack me down
Lemmeh eat som grass
And stroll around
Yeah that’s right.
Huh huh huh huh
Wut wut wut?
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Did Charls send gold? No. Did he send jewelrys? No. What about a fancy sword with Washington's name wrote on the handle? NO.
Charls sent George Washington a mammoth Spanish jack donkey, so that he could start making draft mules like yours truly. And in conclusion, that is why we have the Fourth of July, to celebrate mules in America. It's a fact, you can look it up on the internets.
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Monday, July 2, 2007
Saturday, June 30, 2007
Molly here. How are you? I'm the other mule who lives here and I am happy to have the chance to fill in for Paul today. Paul will not be making a comment today. I am making the comment because Paul is mad. Paul had to work into the rains today. That is unfortunate for Paul. I am sorry to hear that Paul had to get ridden in the rain this afternoon. Are you sorry for Paul? Because *I* am sorry for Paul.
(Editor's Note: I cannot type any more of these lies. The truth is that Molly loathes Paul.)
Okay, may be not every body runs up and hugs me and talks to me like every one does with Paul. But I am the mule that the children like. I am the mule that gives rides to the children and gets lots of pets on the nek. I am also the mule that is not so #*@% big that he takes up all of the room into the trailer and has to have a special bridle and bit and saddle. I am The Normal one. So if you want a normal mule, I'm the one you want. Not that other one.
So like I said, if you want to hear about normal, exciting mule things, I am the one to ask. If you want to hear about foooooooood, or about som body's feeeeeeeeeeet, or about how hongry he is, fine, go talk to Paul. I hope to be making another comment into the future at som point, so stay tuned.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Secret map technology also lets me see where has people logged in from and see who is visiting mah page right now. Oh, hey, I see yoooo. Thanks for stopping by.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Here are som guidelines from the AMA to help you beat the heat.
1. Drink plenty of water. Shove your way to the front of the water trough. Be there first thing when it gets filled up.
2. Limit intake of alcohol and caffeen. Hunh?
3. Eat less protein. "Foods that increase metabolic heat production also increase water loss." Hum, I did not know this. "It is best to eat smaller meals more frequently." I concur.
4. Wear light colored clothing. Or don't wear any clothing at all, except yer anti-fly mask.
5. Wear a wide brimmed hat. Or yer fly mask.
6. Avoid too much sunshine. Stay in your cinderblock shelter, or down at the end of the pasture where all the trees are.
7. Cover windows to block the sun. If you happen to hav a window. If you are like the majority of mules and do not have a window, disregard this one.
8. Stay inside with air-conditioning. See tip #7, above.
9. Plan your errands. If you hav any errands, that is.
10. Schedule strenuous work for early mornings and evenings. Or never. How about never?
Saturday, June 23, 2007
While we are on the subject of health, this might be an appropriate time for me to remind all of you that it is mosquito season. Be sure that you are up to date on all your vaccines (of course) but especially the one against Wes Nile. Wes Nile can kill you.
Friday, June 22, 2007
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Monday, June 18, 2007
I am reasonably certain there is no such animal on earth. But just in case, I am only going to stick my feets in the pond a little ways from now on.
(I has already placed mah order!)
Second of all, I don't even think there is such a place called the beach. Because listen to this. There is no grass and no hays at the beach. All the water at the beach has been salted. And made-up animals live into the water, fish made out of jelly that will sting you, animals with eight arms that can hug you to death, fish with pointy teeth that can bite a mule in two with one chomp.
Sheesh, if she did not want me to go, all she had to do was say so. No need to make up fantasies.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Monday, June 11, 2007
Saturday, June 9, 2007
Mah abcess is almost grown out. While I was walking around eating grass today, mah editor and Miss Paige were talking about how good mah feet are looking. Paige told mah editor how the feet looked when I first came to live here. They was full of holes. I never said anything, but that is why I used to hate to have the hoofs cleaned.
Mah editor does not much care for the Amish peeples. Now that I think about it, I don't either. When I want to go to som place now, I get in the *trailer* and *ride*. I got *lights* in the barn. And if I want to get groomed and fixed up inside, you know what? That's right, I got a *fan* blowing right down on me. Hear that music in teh background? That's playing on teh *radio*.
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Lester would also like to add that he has got his own blog, so PHHHTTTTBBBT!
Friday, June 1, 2007
We cannot yet close the gate.
I thought I was too old to learn but it turns out I have a talent for this kind of thing. What can I say? I'm a mule, I got a big brain.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Who would swing the team at the least command, who would charge a house at the clap of a hand,
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
It is that time of the year when there is fresh green hays laid out for me. A whole truckload of it crawled up into the hay loft on a conveyor belt. I am going to eat every single bit of it by myself and not share it with one single person this means you Bullseye, Whiskey, Senor Huck, Molly all of you %&*#@*.
I saw a broom and tried to eat it. The hay it is made out of tastes terriful.
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Me: “Woman, can you describe how you spend a typical Saturday?”
Mah Editor: “On Saturdays, I usually sleep a little bit late, go running, then go to the grocery store. In the afternoon I go out to see you, sir.”
Me: “Last Saturday, did you go to the grocery store?”
Mah Editor: “Yes, I did.”
Me: “Which grocery store did you go to yesterday, which was a Saturday?”
Mah Editor: “I went to the Wal-Mart Supercenter.”
Me: “Is that the grocery store where you usually shops?”
Mah Editor: “Yes, it is.”
Me: “Is it your regular practice to buy Sam’s Brand Oat and Honey granola bars on your grocery shopping trips?”
Mah Editor: “Yes, it is.”
Me: “Did you buy them yesterday?”
Mah Editor: “No sir, I did not.”
Me: “Thank you. Your Honor, I has no further questions.”
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
I am pleased to report that the new ring is now safe, all scary things are gone. It is now safe to enter the new ring. I repeat, it is now safe to enter the new ring.
Nothing mah editor has matches. Black headstall and reins, havana saddle, white cotton girth . . . she is making me look like a total geek. I know they make brown tack for large fellows, I've seen it on the internets. But I has no moneys!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
I did get a fly mask. It makes me look like a terrorist. On this day I begin mah fly jihad. Death to the fly infidels!
I also have a green and white halter. Green lead rop soon to come, one can only hope.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
I don't mind if you lean over and open the gate while sitting on my back. I got no problems with that. Just watch your knees because I am going to bust through once you swing it open.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Thursday, April 19, 2007
You know what is scary? When stuff is not where it is supposed to be, that's what. Like when you're coming out of the pasture and you look up and all of a sudden there's a big pile of feed bags and Rubbermaid boxes full of blankets and whatnot all up in the middle of the driveway. If somone were to put his ears straight up and stand on his tiptoe, you really couldn't blame him.
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
Monday, April 16, 2007
Friday, April 13, 2007
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
I also got a new harness with CHROMES and I am going to Mule Days, yeah. See you there.
Tuesday, April 3, 2007
Sometimes there is a crowd of people sitting around watching and laughing while two people gang up on the one person, who just happened to be minding his own business when sombody came out and dragged him off the hay pile.
I know a guy that happened to one time.
Monday, April 2, 2007
Sunday, April 1, 2007
<--Here I am, doing what I do best. I really like this picture because in it, I look smaller than I really am and my editor looks larger than she really is. That will teach her to call me fat.
I spent a long time working for some Amish people, who, despite their claims of a simple, godly lifestyle, promptly sent me down to auction in North Carolina once I hit age 17 or so.
I was a good mule. I could pull. I could pull anything. Plows, wagons, heavy logs. Time took a toll on my body. My shoulders are shrunk up because my old owners wouldn't buy me a collar that fit. But, as my therapist says, I got to let the past go. I have got it good now. I don't miss the past. I am glad to live in a place that believes in the internal combustion engine. I like it when people bring me hay and treats on the four-wheeler, yeah. I like living in the 21st century. I like to see people wearing clothes that are colored. If I had known before that people could be this nice, I don't think I could have stood it where I used to be.
And now I have a nice brown collar that fits me perfectly and a whole set of harness all to myself. Today after carrying my editor around in the ring for, like, EVER (ed. note: Our ride lasted 15 minutes), Cowboy hitched me to a little plow and I pulled it around. Hmph, it was light as a feather. ("Paul! You look *slim*!" everyone says to me.) You know what? Mah ears flopped back and forth and I liked it. I say, and I think Cowboy agrees, that plowing is most enjoyable when you do it for funs and not for necessity.
Regardless, we are all going to the big horse show next Saturday and enter the weight pulling contest. I got to show those young fools how it is done. First, though, I need a haircut, another bath and som of that stuff in a can that makes your hair shiny. Sombody has got to polish my harness, too.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Woman! If you are out there, please listen to me! Is this about the washpit, when I repeatedly leaned over to the left in an effort to mash you against the wall? Because if it is, I'm sorry about that. Really. My bad. What? It isn't that? Oh well, okay, never mind then. *rolls eyes shiftily*
[ed. note: I have had to work late every day this week.]
Monday, March 26, 2007
- Name: Paul Casper
- DOB: 1989-ish
- Height: Tall
- Weight: Heavy
- Favorite foods: Apples, pears, carrots, grain. Hay. Peppermints. What is that you got in your hand? Because that looks good too. Are you going to eat all of that by yourself?
- Turn-ons? Food, face scritches, hugs around the neck, being groomed, yeah.
- Turn-offs? Trotting, cantering, fast walking, getting mah feet picked out.
- How long *is* your head, anyway? Mah head is approximately two feet long.
- Where do you live? In the pasture with all mah peeps. Tex, Huck, Comanche, Molly, Nikki . . .
- No, where exactly do you live? Maple Hill Stables on Boulder Road, right next to the barn where they keep the hay and the grains, yeah.